Those who lack humility make themselves dumber, because humility makes you smarter. Here are four specific ways it does that.
1. Knowledge
Know-it-alls have nothing left to learn. Humble people are always learning.
In elementary school, I was afraid of ignorance. I thought that it meant that I was stupid, which was a stupid thing to think. If you've never heard information, it is difficult to retain it (not that memory retention is the measure of intelligence either).
For a time, I was scared to ask questions. I was scared to admit I didn't know something. All it equated to was a lot of missed opportunities to learn something, and that adds up. Today, I always ask if I don't know something, because I've learned that the value of being educated is greater than the slight embarrassment of not knowing something some might expect me to already know.
Pride is so limiting. When you're prideful, you set yourself up on a wobbly perch. The perch is wobbly because we're all flawed, and prideful people have the difficult task of trying to hide their flaws. All of them.
Humility though, allows you to live in a relaxed manner and not hesitate to ask questions and make the right decisions, even if it's slightly embarrassing at times.
2. Social Intelligence and Charisma
Self-centered people don't look outside of themselves. Humility increases your awareness of others and their stories, which enhances understanding, relatability, and makes you more likable.
Recently, I was offered a great deal on a two night hotel stay, but there was a catch. I had to listen to a timeshare sales presentation. The day arrived and I walked into the hotel.
It didn't take long before the salesman noticed I wasn't interested. He asked me where I liked to stay when traveling and I said, "hostels." Meanwhile, he was trying to sell me on upscale timeshares. This prompted him to go on a bit of a tirade about the "low quality" people who stay in hostels.
This man didn't care to understand others unless they stayed in luxury hotels. I was appalled, as I've met some of the nicest, smartest, most adventurous, and highest quality people in hostels. Needless to say, he was not a likable person.
Understanding melts conflict, forges iron relationships, and otherwise connects all people from all walks of life. My favorite part of Stephen Covey's bestseller, The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People, is the life-changing tip, "seek first to understand, then to be understood."
Pride prevents understanding because it forces your attention inward. In order to understand someone, you have to listen to them and empathize with who they are, what they care about, and where they're from. If you only care about who you are and how the world sees you, you'll have shallower relationships, more conflict, and you won't sell as many timeshares.
3. Creativity
Those who are "always right" don't consider other options. Humility expands the mind to all options and bolsters creativity.
Humble people know it's possible for them to be wrong. This comes in handy for creativity, as even the right answer could be "less right" compared to a better, more creative answer. I see this as an indirect manifestation of the prideful vs. humble mindset. If you're prideful, you're more likely to think your first idea is just the best, even if it's unoriginal.
My most creative and successful discovery occurred in a state of complete humility, or perhaps it was humiliation. I was unable to motivate myself to work out for 30 minutes. When I admitted to myself that I wasn't a superhuman machine of productivity and success, I considered any and all other options to get myself going. The idea that came to mind was to do a single, humble push-up. I did it and not only did it change my life by developing into a full-blown exercise habit over the next two years, but the book I wrote on the concept has sold extremely well worldwide and changed thousands more lives.
I almost missed this opportunity because I thought I was "too good" to aim for just one push-up. I thought I was better than that. That was my pride, of course, and I'm fortunate to have given it a chance. One reason I love mini habits is that they're naturally humble behaviors, and can easily grow into great ones. The humble mind has ample room for growth. The prideful mind believes it is already great and so has no room for growth.
4. Flexibility and Problem Solving
Humility gives you options. Pride limits your options.
The theme of this post so far has been the constriction of pride and the freedom of humility. When you don't have an ego to bruise, you have a lot more options. For example, when looking for a place to stay, you can sleep at a motel, hostel, or 5 star hotel, rather than just the fanciest option!
The most common problem-solving benefit of humility is the willingness to ask for help. Asking for help is one of the most humble things you can do. It's saying, "I can't do this alone." The classic example is asking for directions when you're lost. Some are too prideful to do it, and it ends up being a long night for them.
In writing my next book on weight loss, I decided to drop my pre-conceived notions about how best to lose weight and what diets are best. I went into it as a total amatuer. It feels embarrassing to say that because I do know some things about dietetics and nutrition. But a big problem with topics such as weight loss is the tendency of people to go into the research phase already considering themselves an expert or being biased towards a particular solution that may not be best. Thus, they aren't going into it with an eagerness to discover the truth, but with an eagerness to be proven correct.
The less you involve your ego, the easier it will be to solve problems.
Humility is one of those never-talked-about attributes that has some of the greatest benefits for any person's life. I hope this inspires you to live and think humbly.
Stephen Guise
Deep existence
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www.leadershipfromthecore.com
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